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Humor- Two blind pilots walked into the cockpit. One had a dog the other a tap cane.

When the passengers saw a large body of water they screamed and the plane lifted. The one blind pilot said to the other, "Ya know, Bob, one day, they're gonna scream too late and we're all gonna die."

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Humor- I went to the doctor for a physical. My blood pressure was high, cholesterol high, I gained weight, and didn't feel good.

The doctor said eating right doesn't need to be complicated. Fill your plate with bright colors greens, yellows, reds.

I went home and ate a bowl of M&M's and sure enough, I felt better immediately. I never knew eating right could be so easy.